Enjoyment
by SilverMidnight52
Summary: Callen looks over his team thinking about everything that had changed for him since a certain detective came into his life. Part 1 of 'Marriage' series


Another request I got. A little Deeks/Callen with little drama. I think it turned out really well considering I just started writing and let the words take over.

Warning: None

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Nodding his head in thanks Callen picked up the bottles of beer the bartender had put down before turning towards the team. It had been a rather slow day at the office with them mostly taking care of paperwork.

Well, Sam, Kensi, and himself had done paperwork. Deeks, on the other hand, had the misfortune of spending his day with LAPD. Or maybe it was a good thing. Sometimes it was hard to figure if the detective liked being with LAPD or with NCIS.

It wasn't something that any of them really talked about since the man was usually with them. It was so rare that he was gone now that they all felt like something was missing when he was forced to leave.

Luckily, Deeks hadn't been tasked to go on an assignment. Instead he had been doing some training. Which meant that as soon as it was possible for them all to get out of work they were down at a bar catching up.

It still amazed Callen to be able to look over his team and see them as a family. He had so many people in his life that cared about him and that he cared about. He never thought that he'd have that in his life. How had he gotten so lucky?

After everything that he had been through in his life, some of which he had done to himself, he had all but given up on people. He had been fooled too many times to believe that there were people out there that weren't using him for one reason or another.

It was a sad fact that whenever he met someone knew his first thought was wondering just what they were going to do to try to hurt him. The thought came so naturally to him that he didn't pay attention to what it meant until he stopped to thinking. Which wasn't that often.

Okay, so maybe he used to stop and think about it more often than he liked to admit, but that was fine. He had been perfectly fine. He had himself and that was all he had ever needed. It was better that way. Being able to think only about himself was good. Especially with his career.

That was the one thing that was came to mind when he thought about the life that he could have led. He loved what he did too much. It might not be easy, but it was what he wanted to do and that was never going to change.

With everything that he had seen with other agents he knew just how much it could hurt to have someone else in his life. The last thing that he ever wanted to do was harm another person because he had to do his job. A job that could very easily kill him one day.

To him he had every reason to never be close with anyone. Yes, sometimes he hated that, but at the same time he knew that it was better for himself and for others if he stayed the course he was on. He had to keep as many people safe as possible.

Those thoughts had stayed with him even after he joined NCIS and partnered with Sam. Don't get him wrong he cared about the man more than he had ever cared about anyone before. He had become his best friend over the years. Hell, he had become more. They were family.

That didn't change the fact that Sam would be okay without him so he had to be okay without Sam. Secrets were kept on both sides though the other man was more open. That was closer to another person than he ever thought he'd get.

Still, they both knew that he held himself back. Sam had brought him into his life and his family going as far as to have his kids call him 'uncle' and she still held himself back from everything that came with that.

Something that Sam knew. Something that he found highly annoying. They had their fair share of fights about it, but it never changed. He was the person that he was and there was nothing that Sam could do about that in the end. Not that that stopped him from trying.

Just like it didn't stop Hetty, Kensi, or Eric. All of them had tried to get him out of his shell over the years. They all said that they were family and that they cared about him. Which was true. He never doubted that they cared or that they knew him.

That was probably the only thing he disliked about having a team. They all knew each other pretty well. They had to in order to keep each other safe. That also meant that they thought they knew each other well enough to tell the others how to 'be better'.

Maybe they did know each other that well. Maybe they all could improve on each other if they just opened up a little. But maybe he was also annoyed that it felt like they were trying to change him. Even if it was for the better.

Callen had always hated the idea that he was letting people down by being himself. When he was in the system he had tried his hardest to pretend to be anyone other than himself so that someone might actually want him for good.

Now that he was older that was the last thing that he wanted to do. He was done pretending to be someone else for everyone else. He knew better than to try to live his life according to others. Either they liked him as he was or he didn't care.

Even after being with his teams for years he hadn't changed who he was. He still kept to himself and would rather work alone than with others. They knew that he cared about them even as he stood a ways away from them all. It was the best thing for them in the long run.

At least that was his thought process until one Detective Marty Deeks walked unto their team. After that it all went up in the air. Not just with him either. Sam and Kensi both seemed to be a little lost when he came to the man as well.

It was easy to see why too. The man was like no one he had ever known before. He was loud and annoying and intelligent and childish and… He was everything that Callen hadn't known the team had been missing. Everything that he hadn't known he had wanted.

That he come as a shock. He had spent most of his life trying his hardest to never get close to another person, to construct walls around himself, and this random person walks in with a smile and he was done.

No one should have that much power over another being. Yet that was exactly what had happened. He walked in and things were completely different. Deeks hadn't even known that he was doing. He was just being himself.

The scariest part was Callen found that he wanted to bring the younger man into his life. He wanted to let the walls down and see if Deeks was willing to be apart of everything that came with him being himself.

Not that he ever wanted to admit that out loud. In fact, as soon as he realized what he was feeling he had been a little on the mean side. Anything to keep the man at arms length while he attempted to deal with the feelings he didn't want to have.

With anyone else his attitude and frankly downright vicious barbs would have pushed them away. Hell, he had gotten told off by Kensi more than once while Hetty stared at him in disappointment.

Once again Deeks proved to be different than anyone else. Instead of leaving he came back even with a smile on his lips as if nothing had happened. It was as if he knew what Callen was trying to do and was having none of it.

All of it was just too much for Callen to deal with. He never prepared for someone like Marty Deeks. He had no idea what he was supposed to do to push the guy away. He didn't even know if he wanted to push him away.

Then Deeks asked him out. He literally asked him out on a date one day when they were leaving. What was he supposed to do with that when he had been trying so hard to keep himself away from him?

Deeks had taken the choice away from him though without even meaning to. All it took was one little shy smile from the man and all his protests went out the window before he could even think of them. He didn't realize he had even said yes until they were at the restaurant halfway through the meal.

That first date had happened more than two years ago and, for the first time in a long time, he was content with life. He had love in his life. Not just the love of a lover either. Of a best friend. Of a family.

The weight in his pocket suddenly seemed like a ton though he knew it barely weighed anything. Everything that came with what he was thinking of doing though… It was like the whole world was resting on him. He didn't know if he hated the feeling all that much.

It was odd to think, but ever since he had opened up to Deeks he had felt stronger than he had ever felt before. As if he could walk through Heaven, Hell, and everything in-between if it meant that he got to be with the man for a moment longer.

"You okay, G?" Sam questioned walking up to him and taking some of the beers from his hand, "The others are getting worried."

"Just thinking," he responded his hand unconsciously moving to his pocket.

"Oh. You finally got it."

"Picked it up during lunch."

"You gonna asked now?"

"No, I was thinking… I want it to be more special than this. That's how it usually goes. Right?"

"Depends on the couple. Not going to lie. I don't think you and Deeks really fit into the whole grand proposal thing. Simple would work well."

"Proposal..."

"What?"

"Nothing. I just… Shouldn't that feel like something more than it does?"

"G, you love Deeks. Yes, you're going to ask him to marry you, but I know you and I know your views on marriage."

"My views?"

"You think that marriage is just a huge party to show people what you already know. That you're in love and that you're in it for the long haul. That doesn't come with a lot of hidden meaning."

"I know. I'm..."

"Freaking out?"

"I thought my future husband was supposed to be the one finishing my sentences."

"Only if you ever get around to asking him. Look, just… Don't over think this one, G. Enjoy the moment. Enjoy your love. Enjoy the fact that Deeks is coming over here with that smile on his face. Enjoy the fact that I'm going to go dump bleach in my eyes."


End file.
